So...I re-quit as of Tuesday.

I've quit smoking about 3 times now, give or take. I quit after I got pneumonia at my friend Oren's pool party; I quit after my friend Glennis's 30th b-day; I quit when packs in NYC went up to 10 bucks.

Each time, I've done great right out of the gate. Then, I allow myself one or, even worse, allow myself to be talked into one. It's sad. I've decided that I no longer like this.

I am going to start an informal list of reasons why I quit. I think there's some sort of ad campaign that does the same thing (probably to get you to take some drug the pharmaceutical companies are peddling thru some sort of handshake with the tabacco industries) but, they can go screw. This is for me. Enjoy (and, like me, hope this sticks).


Reason #1: My friend Daniel burned me with his cigarrete & left a scar when we were on a smoke break together.

Real creepy-like.

Sometimes, the Quote Of The Day site reads my mind and freaks me out.

The only thing I was fit for was to be a writer, and this notion rested solely on my suspicion that I would never be fit for real work, and that writing didn't require any.
- Russell Baker

Eerie.

Other times, I want to pee on whoever makes the quote selections:

If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail.

Abraham Maslow

Mortified Love Edition

Mortified Love Edition
Originally uploaded by Anya Garrett

Thanks Anya!

Rent My Smith Street,Brooklyn Apartment!

So, the time has come for me to vacate my Smith Street diggs after 6 wonderful years...giving you all 1st crack as we are on the lease until July 31st, 2009 and want to make sure it's rented March 1st no matter what. Details:

-2 bedroom, one bath apartment with large kitchen full of storage, den AND living room-seriously! It is HUGE.
-Located on corner of Smith & Baltic Streets
-2nd floor of privately owned building- we are the only tenants
-Rent is currently $2,100.00 thru May '09 lease (That includes heat, electricity and water - gas separate, about $20 a month)
-Landlord and family live in apartment below
-3 Min. to F Train, 10 min walk to A/C/2/3/4/5/N at Borough Hall
-1 large bedroom with closet, one smaller bedroom with no closet- 2 closets in hallway with plenty of space
-Large kitchen with dishwasher, tons of cabinet space, full sized appliances (great for a cook)- enough room for a bistro table too!
-1 bathroom, bathtub/shower combo with frosted glass doors, fully tiled
-Large living room and den- the common space in this place is insane and is the best feature. 5 windows, 3 facing Baltic Street and 2 facing Smith so lots of fresh air and natural light. All bedrooms have windows as well.

There is a laundromat around the corner and apartment is across the street from a grocery store, very convenient. Wired for cable. Safe, always busy bustling neighborhood- you get a little noise sometimes because we are right on the corner but, nothing a nice white noise machine or the air conditioner won't mask nicely.

This block is full of every boutique they write about in LuckyMagazine each month and peppered with restaraunts & swanky cocktail lounges that make befuddled Manhattan dwellers sulk of the F train(Char. #4, Clover Club, The Grocery, Po)

It's an AMAZING space, very cozy and warm with lots of legroom. You have to see it to believe the cost for the location...insane.

We'll start showing it officially Feb.17th- contact me for an appointment, before we hand it off to a broker!

Tim And Eric Awesome Show, Great Job is the best thing of all time and fuck you if you don't agree.

Tim & Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! Season Quad! from Eric Wareheim on Vimeo.

Shine On, You Crazy Southern Diamond.

I was noodling around online, in an aimless lazy Sunday search for the names of Paula Deen's various dogs. On the TV as background noise was an episode of a Food Network show that detailed Paula helping what has to be the most boring couple I have EVER seen renovate their boring kitchen in their BOOOOOORRRRIIIIINNNNGGGG house. I mean, between the two of them they have the personality of a piece of discarded gum. Example: after the reveal, the mouse-wife raises her voice about one notch to semi-whisper, "Oh my GOSH...there's ducks!" Never were more profound words uttered.

So of course you can see why I was more intrigued by the idea of Paula's dogs...and my search led me to a post on TV Squad and, the ensuing comments. The winner of the bunch is posted here in its entirety.

After reading this comment, I have decided that I sincerely wish the terrorists would bomb Middle America next time. Specifically, the petty mean-spirited c*@t who wrote this tripe. She strikes me as the type of Southern shrew who chuckles over her family's slave owning past as if it's kind of a quaint affectation. I hope she chokes on her sweet tea, I really do.

Enjoy!

Recent Comments:

Food Network hopes Paula Deen will attract younger viewers {TV Squad}

Oct 15th 2006 3:48PM My husband and I have been Paula Deen fans since she first set foot on FoodNetwork...clear back to Gordon Elliott's show Door Knock Dinners where she was a guest chef. Unfortunately, her fame and fortune have taken away her down home southern belle class and replaced it with arrogance, flash, and risque behavior. My husband says if he were Michael, he'd put his foot down about some of the things she does on her show (i.e. licking a guest's mouth to get some food off his lips, hopping into bed with an engaged couple, rubbing a guest's hair and commenting on how hard it was and laughing her now-irritating laugh.

Paula, you had a huge fan-base before you started acting like a southern tart. If you ditch the trash talk and smutty behavior, you'll see we're still right there behind you loving you each step of the way. But your new ways grew old and tiresome very quickly. Get back to basics! You shine brighter than the biggest diamond!

Paula and Richard Pearman