Two, too hype.

Things have been insane lately. And by "things" I mean, me. Just so busy, so crazed and all. Anyway, here's what I've been up to of late:

• I drove a car in New York City (and did well by the way, thanks, only yelled at by one traffic cop who then laughed with me at my automobile follies) all the while howling along to Nada Surf at top volume. Thanks, Zipcar! Thanks, Griffin Audio iTrip transmitter! And thanks, Jesus!
• I shot a fucking awesome video with the Party Central USA crew and I cannot WAIT to see it. Oren Brimer, super comedy man, was on the 1"s & 2's for it. That's the wrong term but I liked it, so suck it if you must.
• I brought my lovely bike back down from Poughkeepsie and got it tricked out with two baskets on the back and a bell that says "I Love My Bike". Amelia Bedelia is in full effect on the streets of Brooklyn!
• I got to have a lovely convo with my pal Brent Sullivan about politics, drama and makeout tactics, all while drooling at my latest hot-stuff conquest acrost the bar.
• I attended the FANTASTIC Beauty Bar Comedy Show's One Year Anniversary Shindig and wished the oh, so crushable Vince Averill a Happy 24th Birthday! Remember Vince, you have vertigo, but vertigo doesn't have you, right good buddy?!
• I crashed a party in a white stretch limo full of hot Broadway gayboys and shotgunned PBR with Wendy Ho and John F. O'Donnell. Too good to be true. BUT IT IS!!!!!!!
• I got to perform on stage with the inimiatable Sue Ball, eat ice cream with Matt McCarthy, be yelled at for heckling by Pete Holmes- all in one show! And then, I traipsed over to Doc Holiday's whereupon I acted the fool with the likes of Nathan Kloke, handsome troublemaker and partner in mischief esquire.
• I turned my head and missed the very drunken Ms. Sara Jo Allocco taking a spill ala Beyonce' as she marched into the Polish dive bar Lucy's to retrive Kloke and I after we ran away to do shots and ditched Doc's because some hefty Polish gal decided to start pole dancing and kept sitting on Matt Sears's head.
• I made fun of people to their faces during a very crowded brunch shift and still got tipped!
• I managed not to get wrecked after the latest Kissing Booth, where we all dressed in gross beach clothes and made fun of idiots who like beach volleyball. Sideout Sport this, FAG!
• I found a pair of dope limited edition Adidas and only paid 30 bucks for them on sale!
• I explained to my cat Nigel that if he jumped up on my head one more fucking time while I was sleeping he was going to the pound and then, cried for even joking like that!
• I bled on my roommate Porter's favorite towel due to my annoying old period! JUST KIDDING PORTER (or am I?)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• I developed a totally lame and predicatble, yet unsatiable, addiction to XXX Vitamin Water! $2 for a bottle of watered down Kool Aid?! What a rip!
  
• I read a shitload of books: Wasted, Possible Side Effects, Beauty Junkies, Not Buying It, Confessions of a Memory Eater, Love Monkey.
• I got some new albums from some old bands, Camera Obscura, Nada Surf, The Libertines.
• I went to a secret show on the boat Peking in South Street Seaport to see the AWESOME Fountains of Wayne with Matt Sears. There was an open bar hosted by Grey Goose and I had about 19 cocktails and then went to Long Island City to the karaoke portion of the comedy show hosted there by John F. O'Donnell and sang ELO and yelled at everyone about the musical genius of Jeff Lynne.
• And...I quit smoking for one full hour!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So that's what's new in Brandyland. And you, kittens? How's tricks?

Do tell.