Thursday, May 22, 2008

The Day The Popping Off Died: Bad Girl's Club II is no more.

I knew it would come to and end, I just didn't realize how empty I would feel inside without my Tanisha fix. There were times I got cross with her for being unfair & unreasonable but you know what, no one is perfect and I have to say she impressed me with her growth. I want the best for her, I truly do. This second season of Oxygen's smash The Bad Girl's Club was my special treat to myself and I enjoyed the bejeezus out of it.

Why would I waste my time, you ask? Reality shows are beneath us, says you? Well, put down your pipe and that leather bound tome of yours, and take a gander at this, Einstein. I defy you to tell me this show was not fucking riveting, rollicking comedy gold afer reading this excerpted entry from Tanisha's online blog, regarding the explosive BGC2 reunion special:

It was shocking that Lyric [who left the house after only 2 weeks and a lot of crappy Rasta-esque poetry and really, really lame raps as discussed by the always amazing Jezebel- Ed.] decided to verbally attack me. I was completely thrown off because first of all I never had a problem with her mal-nourished spaghetti string, broom stick bamboo a$$.

She left the house simply because her sorry a$$ was there for all the wrong damn reasons. I mean come on now. Who the hell is going to sign someone that has the same name as the words of a song? Lyric? Yeah right Melissa! Try using your real name you hating a$$ b*tch! What I want to know is How the f*ck am I jealous of your nasty stringy scrawny dirty filthy a$$? B*tch what the hell are you doing with yourself? Besides making home videos and hitting up your local karaoke clubs and posting them on you tube? You’re a hater and that's all you will ever be Beiotch!

When your a$$ left we left on good terms. I hugged your frail a$$ and said my good-byes and that was that. I even spoke to you over the phone once after that when your pathetic worthless waste of good life a$$ called crying on the phone talking about "I should have never left man. Damn". B*tch get f*cking real!

You call yourself a queen? A role model and a star? Hahaha! The joke’s on you. You didn't last two seconds on the Bad Girls Club, the Tyra show, or the reunion. You’re just a hating a$$ trick that can't get a record deal even if you slept with half of the record execs across the U.S. You make me sick because your wack and weak and so damn fake!

You knew you had to leave the house b*tch because there could only be one captain and that was me! Your a f*cking loser flat a$$ wanna be rapper b*tch! Keep hating because I will always be big and marvelous. And you...well I suggest you go "watch a Tyra".

The only reason why I didn't drop kick your sorry a$$ was because I know how the LAPD gets down in LA. Thank the heavens you good for nothing smut!
**On another note it was cool seeing some of the old camera crews. I think that was the best part of all. To the bouncer who held me back: Lyric owes you her sorry a$$ life!**

Whoooo-weeee! Lyric does, indeed, need to fall back like "whoa"! I cackled like a plump, hateful hen throughout this reunion special and it left me wanting oh, so much more. All I know is, I am going to ask Tanisha to be my MySpace friend and if she says no, I may have to pop off this mortal coil.

Farewell, BGC2. Enjoy this final goodbye...a touching song tribute if ever there was one.

PS When you watch Oxygen's video clips for this show, the stupid mini-ad that comes on is for canker sores...say no more.

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