Monday, December 20, 2004

My heart itches.

Reading all the materials for my thesis has put me in a terrible mood today. I'm so depressed over the state of federal arts funding now that I don't even want to write the damned paper. And not even because of my constant habit of procrastination, either. So shut it, clown.

My Mom and I went to the Sav-On (local drug store) and it had this "auto checkout" option. You scan your own groceries and bag them. The bag rests on top of a scale which calculates how much your groceries should weigh so you can't swipe a bunch of stuff. My Mom said she hated the machine but we ended up using it anyway. It turned into a sort of slap fight, with my Mom trying to swat my hands away from the key pad and me saying, "Mom you're banned from the scale, stop putting too much on it!" Potato chips were nearly crushed, as were familial ties, being that we turned on one another as the machine bellowed out, "Please remove unscanned item from bag now!!!" The item in questions you ask? A bag of Black Forest Gummy Bears. In an intriguing twist the machine then double charged us for the VERY SAME BEARS!! I lived the movie "I, Robot". Also I learned my Mom and I would be a shitty team on the Amazing Race. Unless I got breast implants to fill out a fuschia sports bra. Then it'd be on.

1 comment:

The Quiet Traveler said...

i love those machines. another way for me to avoid human contact and the annoying question of " do you have a (store name here) credit card? you can save 10% right now for signing up!" assholes.