Friday, March 31, 2006
Because It's In The Scorpion's Nature.
OK, seriously. I have hives! Stress hives! How can someone who does so little have such powerful stress that she actually breaks out in hives, you ask? How the fuck should I know?! Oh, well.
What's odd is, I am as of right now, in the best mood I have been in in days. Nay, maybe in months. And no, I am not drunk. I just turned the corner on some stuff, and realized I'd been a major asshole to myself and some other people in the process. And realizing that, and making steps to not be that way to people who don't deserve it, gives one a sense of peace. It's born out of control. I like being in control of my emotions. I know that all sounds corny, like some dofus girl's syrupy pink-paginated diary entry about karma after she attends her first yoga class. But it's true.
I had an epiphany: I spend a lot of time being angry at many people for being The Scorpion. If you don't know the fable, look at it here. Basically, why be angry at a scorpion for biting people? It's inhernet in its nature. It can't help what it is, and you run the risk of being bitten when handling it, no matter how gently. I need to stop putting people on pedestals, expecting them to be perfect when no one is. I'm not. Yet I get so frustrated when my expectations aren't met. I wonder lately if these are even realistic. I ask a lot from people. This type of pointless rumination may explain the fucking hives. Sheesh.
Ben just called and said he had spied my doeppleganger walking ahead of him in Manhattan. I wonder if he will tell her "Get over yourself!" Hope so.