Prom 2007.

Ingredients needed:

1. home-made tulip corsages
2. Malibu Mango & Cook's Champagne cocktails, with a dash of Red Bull
3. SUV Taxi ride to Times Square for Prom 2007 Supper at Red Lobster
4. Countless hate-drenched glares from other patrons, most of whom seemed to be uniformed in some combination of leather Starter jackets, Timberlands and Coach bags.*
5. 1 Long Island Iced Tea, 1 margarita on the rocks, 1 Mai Tai, and 1 Bahama Mama at the "bar".
6. Lobster rolls, shrimp dip, crab legs and more scarfed down and topped off with Bud Lights. Crab legs used as artifical limbs.
7. Fake birthday request put in by Kloke; shitty cake dropped off with half-hearted song from waitstaff to Brandy. Later, Brandy shoves entire ball of freezer-burned vanilla ice cream in her face.
8. Drunken staggering out into freezing cold, snatching up of cab, from which Sara hurls inebriated chants at hooligans driving past in stretch Hummer while Kloke and Brandy cower on the floor and Oren exclaims giddily to the cab driver, "We ate at Red Lobster!!!"
9. Return to the He Man Woman-Hater's Clubhouse in Chelsea. More consumption of various substances. Viewing of Peanut Butter, Eggs and Dice episode of Mister Show. Snoring from Sara.
10. Sara and Brandy peace out at midnight in someone's kindly donated bed.

Best. Prom. Ever.


*also, minor near fistfight incurred by Barber. During spitting of insults (one of which was "Shut the fuck up or I'll punch that fucking acne off your face") Kloke shakes head wistfully, chuckles and says "Oh, here we go!"