I have decided to make a god-damned wish list because, WHY NOT that's why. I mean, really, people. What are the choices here? Let us review them.
Dedicate my free time to helping needy children learn to make panninis? (S N O R E)
OR
Blatantly 'n' shamelessly beg for material items me likey? (J-J-J-Jackpot!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!)
Now, I am more than happy to send you a picture of my pedicure or, like, my underpants or something. That is if you're that naughty type of grampa that intends to bankroll my disgusting consumerism in exchange for such delicacies. Otherwise BEAT IT.
See, Mom?! I'm harnessing my creativity in order to afford the lifestyle I so deeply desire after all. Now aren't you proud of your pretty little Ivy League drop out?
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